Attention to Holy Orders: God's Word for Men, Women, and Marriage

Originally preached February 9, 2020

Text: 2 Timothy 3:15-17

Today, I’d like to set before you two methods, or techniques if you will, that in my opinion, promote biblical health and wholeness among God’s people.  Both can be derived from Scripture.  

Since there is no health without His truth, both of these methods push believers to Scripture.

The first method is simply reading the Bible, or as the ESV puts it, “the public reading of Scripture.”

Every so often, we mostly “read” instead of “preach” a message.  Why?  First because it’s commanded:

1 Timothy 4:11-13 (KJV)  These things command and teach.  12  Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.  13  Till I come, give attendance to reading (public reading of Scripture, ESV), to exhortation, to doctrine.

Secondly, because we believe feeding God’s flock the whole counsel of God is a pastoral duty.  Paul said to the Ephesian elders:

Acts 20:26-31 (KJV)  Wherefore I take you to record this day, that I am pure from the blood of all men.  27  For I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God.  28  Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood.  29  For I know this, that after my departing shall grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock.  30  Also of your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away disciples after them.  31  Therefore watch, and remember, that by the space of three years I ceased not to warn every one night and day with tears.

The second technique is simply seeking out the commands of God, the imperatives…again finding out “what saith the LORD” on an issue.  This is critical.  The Precepts of the LORD form for us a foundational picture, a basic grid; they give us the beautiful guardrails within which we walk and pursue His purposes.

When you join an organization or take an new job, the first order of business is to find out the “job description.”  The descriptions constitute the basics of your assignment…the non-negotiables.  

A very healthy hermeneutical technique is to first ask, “What has the LORD commanded on this?  What statutes, regulations, or laws has He laid down for us to follow?”

Again, as we found out last week, the Bible is Inspired, Inerrant, Infallible, and Sufficient!

2 Timothy 3:15-17 (KJV)  And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.  16  All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:  17  That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.

We learned that…

  1. The Scriptures should be studied learned early in life! (v15)

  2. The Scriptures are able to make us wise! (v15)

  3. The Scriptures teach us the Gospel! (v15)

  4. The Scriptures come from God! (v16)

  5. The Scriptures are profitable…useful and advantageous! (v16)

  6. The Scritpure teach the “teachings” or doctrines. From Scripture we learn the precepts of God and the great themes that drive His redemption narrative. (v16)

  7. The Scriptures convict us. (reproof) They examine us. They show us our living vs. God’s prescription. (V16)

  8. The Scriptures correct us. (v16)

  9. The Scriptures instruct us in how to live in a godly “right” way. (vv16-17)

  10. The promise is if we hold to the Word of God, we can be more “complete” and “equipped” for every good work. (ESV)

Please review that very pivotal message!

Now be warned.  God’s Word doesn’t necessarily jibe with modern thinking or cultural norms.  Indeed, one takes a risk these days when proclaiming the whole counsel of God.  Nevertheless…

Friends, let us be willing to see what God has to say about these VERY important areas which are subject to so much confusion in our day.  As we read, let us remember that God’s ways are “ways of pleasantness, and all (his) paths are peace” (Prov 3:17), and that God’s Word is wonderful:

Psalms 119:127-129 (KJV)  Therefore I love thy commandments above gold; yea, above fine gold.  128  Therefore I esteem all thy precepts concerning all things to be right; and I hate every false way.  129  Thy testimonies are wonderful: therefore doth my soul keep them.

This is the point for today!  There are so many opinions floating around manhood, womanhood, and marriage.  We all have them.  I submit the place to start in reviving our relationships is the same place we must start with any issue.  As king Zedekiah asked Jeremiah, “Is there any word from the LORD?” (Jer 37:17)

Indeed there is!  Like the psalmist declared:

Psalms 107:20-21 (KJV)  He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.  21  Oh that men would praise the LORD for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!

God’s Word concerning Men, Women, and Marriage


The Foundation 

Genesis 1:1 (KJV)  In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

Genesis 1:26-28 (KJV)  And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.  27  So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.  28  And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

Genesis 2:18-25 (KJV)  And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.  19  And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.  20  And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.  21  And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;  22  And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.  23  And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.  24  Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.  25  And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

The Fall

Genesis 3:1-20 (KJV)  Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?  2  And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:  3  But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.  4  And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:  5  For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.  6  And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.  7  And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.  

8  And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.  9  And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou?  10  And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.  11  And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?  12  And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.  13  And the LORD God said unto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.  

14  And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:  15  And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.  

16  Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.  

17  And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat of it all the days of thy life;  18  Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;  19  In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.  

20  And Adam called his wife's name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.


God’s Governmental and Creation Order Reiterated in the New Testament

  • 1 Corinthians 11:3 (KJV) But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

  • 1 Timothy 2:11-15 (KJV) Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. 12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. 13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. 15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

Some New Testament Commands for Men

Strength

1 Corinthians 16:13-14 (KJV)  Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong.  14  Let all your things be done with charity.

Leadership

  • 1 Timothy 2:8 (KJV) I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting.

  • 1 Timothy 3:1-7 (KJV) This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work. 2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behaviour, given to hospitality, apt to teach; 3 Not given to wine, no striker, not greedy of filthy lucre; but patient, not a brawler, not covetous; 4 One that ruleth well his own house, having his children in subjection with all gravity; 5 (For if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?) 6 Not a novice, lest being lifted up with pride he fall into the condemnation of the devil. 7 Moreover he must have a good report of them which are without; lest he fall into reproach and the snare of the devil.

  • Titus 1:5-9 (KJV) For this cause left I thee in Crete, that thou shouldest set in order the things that are wanting, and ordain elders in every city, as I had appointed thee: 6 If any be blameless, the husband of one wife, having faithful children not accused of riot or unruly. 7 For a bishop must be blameless, as the steward of God; not selfwilled, not soon angry, not given to wine, no striker, not given to filthy lucre; 8 But a lover of hospitality, a lover of good men, sober, just, holy, temperate; 9 Holding fast the faithful word as he hath been taught, that he may be able by sound doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers.

Provision

1 Timothy 5:8 (KJV)  But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.

Older Men

Titus 2:1-2 (KJV)  But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine:  2  That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience.

Younger Men

  • 2 Timothy 2:22 (KJV) Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.

  • Titus 2:6 (KJV) Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. (“Self-controlled” ESV)

  • 1 Peter 5:5 (KJV) Likewise, ye younger, submit yourselves unto the elder. Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.

Propriety in Worship

  • 1 Corinthians 11:4 (KJV) Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head.

  • 1 Corinthians 14:26-30 (KJV) How is it then, brethren? when ye come together, every one of you hath a psalm, hath a doctrine, hath a tongue, hath a revelation, hath an interpretation. Let all things be done unto edifying. 27 If any man speak in an unknown tongue, let it be by two, or at the most by three, and that by course; and let one interpret. 28 But if there be no interpreter, let him keep silence in the church; and let him speak to himself, and to God. 29 Let the prophets speak two or three, and let the other judge. 30 If any thing be revealed to another that sitteth by, let the first hold his peace.

Some New Testament Commands for Women

Modesty

1 Timothy 2:9-10 (KJV)  In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;  10  But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

Older Women

  • 1 Timothy 5:3-4 (KJV) Honour widows that are widows indeed. 4 But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable before God.

  • 1 Timothy 5:9-10 (KJV) Let not a widow be taken into the number under threescore years old, having been the wife of one man, 10 Well reported of for good works; if she have brought up children, if she have lodged strangers, if she have washed the saints' feet, if she have relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every good work.

  • Titus 2:3 (KJV) The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

Younger Women

  • 1 Timothy 5:14 (KJV) I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

  • Titus 2:4-5 (KJV) That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Propriety in Worship

  • 1 Corinthians 11:5-6 (KJV) But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven. 6 For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered.

  • 1 Corinthians 14:34-37 (KJV) Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law. 35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church. 36 What? came the word of God out from you? or came it unto you only? 37 If any man think himself to be a prophet, or spiritual, let him acknowledge that the things that I write unto you are the commandments of the Lord.

To the Unmarried

1 Corinthians 7:1-2 (KJV)  Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.  2  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

1 Corinthians 7:8-9 (KJV)  I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.  9  But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

New Testament Commands for Marriage

Jesus reaffirms Genesis

  • Matthew 19:4-6 (KJV) And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Order, Unity, and Purpose in Biblical Marriage

  • Ephesians 5:22-33 (KJV) Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

  • Colossians 3:18-19 (KJV) Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.

Order AND Heirs together: No Contradiction…just Beauty!

1 Peter 3:1-7 (KJV)  Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;  2  While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.  3  Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;  4  But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.  5  For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:  6  Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.  7  Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

The Blessings of Marriage

  • 1 Corinthians 7:3-4 (KJV) Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

  • Hebrews 13:4 (KJV) Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

A Great Purpose for Marriage

Ephesians 6:4 (KJV)  And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. (See also Gen 1:28, Deut 6, Mal 2:15, etc.)

Final Exhortation:

After reading so much of the inspired, inerrant, infallible, and sufficient Word of God, you may be asking, “How do I apply the Scriptures to my life?”

The simple answer: Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to help you be willing to adjust your life to the Scriptures rather than the Scriptures to your life.  The rest will fall into place.

Amen.